


Sweeten the Deal

by Flutterbeam (aretia)



Category: Silicon Valley (TV)
Genre: M/M, Smut
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-05-24
Updated: 2016-05-24
Packaged: 2018-06-10 12:27:30
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,768
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6956461
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/aretia/pseuds/Flutterbeam
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>With Jared’s help, Bighead realizes that Erlich’s partnership will screw him over, so Erlich resorts to a different kind of persuasion.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Sweeten the Deal

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first ever Silicon Valley smut, so please be gentle with me. Thanks to youjik33 and SexuallyMonsterous for helping me with the details.

Jared walked into the kitchen and found Bighead repeatedly chucking an apple onto the floor and picking it up. He wasn’t going to ask, but Bighead didn’t even acknowledge him before he launched into an explanation himself. “One time I saw my cousin bounce an apple. I was like, ‘apples don’t bounce,’ but I think I’ve almost got it. Then again, my cousin does magic tricks. Maybe he was messing with me.” 

“I see. That’s an interesting story. And why are we bouncing apples tonight?” Jared queried.

“Oh. I was thinking about what juicer to get Erlich, and I started looking at the fruit, and I got distracted.” 

That raised more questions than it answered. “Pardon?” Jared asked.

“Oh, um. Erlich broke two of mine, and now he wants me to buy him another one because he’s mad at me. Cause this business partnership we’re doing, with our incubators and stuff, I had my business guy look over the contracts, and Erlich said I didn’t trust him or something. I don’t know what’s going on.” With barely a pause, he grabbed a handful of blueberries from a bowl and said, “Blueberries are weird. We call them blueberries, but blueberry flavored things are purple, and they turn your tongue purple.” He shoved some in his mouth. 

“That’s strange,” Jared murmured.

“I know right?” Bighead replied. “Look.” He stuck out his tongue to reveal the purple blueberry mush.

“No, I meant that it’s absolutely within your rights to have someone more experienced with business look over a contract. Why would Erlich be offended by your doing that? Unless he has something to hide…” 

“Well, Jared, you’re a business guy. And Erlich’s not here right now. Do you want to take a look at it?”

“Certainly,” Jared agreed, smiling brightly. He sat down at the kitchen table and skimmed the papers, while Bighead continued his futile efforts to bounce the apple. Several minutes later, Jared piped up. “It’s just as I was afraid of. Erlich is clearly trying to take advantage of your… admittedly low financial knowledge to rob you blind.” 

“What?” Bighead put down the apple and pulled up a chair to sit beside Jared at the table.

“Look here. The only thing Erlich owns of value, if I do say so myself, is Pied Piper, and he explicitly excludes his Pied Piper shares from the deal. He gets all of your twenty million dollars and you get almost nothing in return.”

“But I get Erlich.” Bighead couldn’t explain what it was about Erlich, maybe that he was so confident in everything he did, but being his business partner just seemed like the natural thing to do, given the opportunity. “You know, man, it’s Erlich.”

“I see. If Erlich’s charisma and business acumen is worth your entire fortune to you, then this is a good deal. But—and this is my professional opinion and not colored by Erlich’s mistreatment of me in the past—it is not.” Jared placed a hand on Bighead’s shoulder. “Bighead, I care about you and I don’t want to see you ruined by a mistake. Don’t make this partnership. Get out while you still can.” 

Jared stood up, squeezed Bighead’s shoulder, and walked away. Bighead stuffed the papers into his messenger bag. As he walked out of the kitchen, he picked up the apple he had been tossing around, now bruised and squishy, but still edible, he supposed. He washed it off in the sink and took a bite out of it.

 

The Avaitvan squealed into the driveway of the mansion, and Erlich jumped out and stormed into the house. “Bighead, you fucking coward!” he boomed so loudly that it shook the walls and echoed throughout the building. He stomped down the hallway to the kitchen. Bighead wasn’t there, but a bunch of his incubees were, staring at Erlich wide-eyed over their laptops, video games paused to watch the drama. “Tell me where that little slime is so I can stomp him into a puddle,” Erlich growled.

“He’s probably in his office upstairs,” Fred said. 

Erlich turned around and marched out of the kitchen and up the stairs. By the time he reached the office, the heat of his rage had died down somewhat. It was stoked again when he saw Bighead facing the door in his swivel chair, with all the misplaced confidence of a suburban teenager on the cover of his self-produced rap album, arms crossed, feet planted firmly on the ground. “Why the fuck didn’t you come to the hacker hostel to sign the papers like you said you would?” Erlich demanded. “You’re even dumber than you look if you think it’s a good idea to piss me off.” 

“You think I’m dumb? Well, I’m not,” was Bighead’s sassy reply. Erlich’s fury brought out the fire in him to match it, and he was riding the high. “Jared looked at the contract, and it turns out my business guy was right, it’s a piece of shit.” 

“You think you get to tell me what a piece of shit looks like?” Erlich retorted. He grabbed Bighead’s collar and pulled him to his feet so that he was staring him in the face, looming over him, as Erlich was almost a foot taller. “I built my business and my incubator from the ground up. You’re just a little shit who crawled out of some podunk Midwestern town and got lucky because you’re cute.”

Bighead tried to formulate another snappy comeback, but he was stuck on the last word Erlich had said. “Wait. You think I’m cute?”

“Yes, you’re fucking adorable and you’re so fucking distracting because every time I’m in the same room as you all I can think about is how much I want to hold you down and ram my dick in your ass,” Erlich roared. He let go of Bighead’s shirt and straightened his posture. Erlich realized he’d said too much. “Oh shit. Um…”

Everything fell into place. The bad business deal, the insistence on trust, the irrational anger, could be explained by Erlich having a crush on him. The fact itself was pretty hard to believe, but in context, it made everything else make sense. He was an idiot for not noticing the signs before. Then again, he wasn’t exactly known for his perceptiveness. 

While Erlich was still pausing and mumbling and trying to get his bearings, Bighead took his face in his hands and kissed him. He ran his fingers through Erlich’s beard and his curly hair, which were surprisingly soft. Erlich’s lips against his were firm and insistent, his tongue flicking into his mouth. He nibbled on Bighead’s lip and made him whimper. Erlich’s arms wrapped around Bighead, one hand tangled in his hair and the other meandering down his back to grab his ass. Then, Erlich’s hands were on top of his shoulders, pushing him down onto the desk. The first coherent thought he’d had since he kissed Erlich was how uncomfortably the edge of the desk was digging into his back. He pushed Erlich’s face away for a second to mutter, “Um. Bed?”

Erlich grunted affirmatively, and slipped his hands under Bighead’s thighs and lifted him up. He exited the office, and Bighead pointed down the hall to his room, then went back to kissing him. Fred was walking up the stairs to his own room when he saw them, and spat out his smoothie. 

 

Erlich carried Bighead to his room and laid him down on the plush king-size bed. “We’re really doing this?” Bighead asked.

“Only if you want to,” Erlich said.

Bighead was surprised to find that he did. “Sure,” he said.

Erlich dove on top of him and they continued making out. Erlich pulled Bighead’s shirt up over his head, and Bighead gasped as Erlich’s mouth moved down from his lips to his neck and his chest. He left hickeys on the soft skin, and sucked and swirled his tongue around Bighead’s nipples, teasing them to sharp points. Bighead laughed at the first thought that popped into his head, which was NipAlert.

“What?” Erlich said.

“Nothing. Keep doing that,” Bighead giggled, placing his hand behind Erlich’s head and pressing him back down to his chest. 

Erlich’s lips moved down further, and he undid the button of Bighead’s shorts and pulled them off. Erlich stood up and threw off his clothes, quickly catching up with the level of undress. Then he knelt at the foot of the bed and took Bighead’s cock into his mouth, while at the same time licking his fingers and pressing them into Bighead’s ass. “Oh fuck, Erlich,” Bighead screamed. It felt weird, but really good.

Erlich looked up. “Ready?” he asked.

“Uh. Yeah. If you think so,” Bighead replied nervously. Erlich climbed back onto the bed. He was wearing a condom, how considerate of him, Bighead wouldn’t have remembered to ask for that even if it was in the back of his fuzzy mind that he should have. Erlich pulled Bighead’s legs onto his lap and slid into him. He leaned down and kissed him gently—almost too gently, considering that this had started with an argument—oh, never mind. Erlich rocked his hips and started pounding into Bighead hard. It kind of hurt, but then he started hitting a spot that made Bighead moan.

“You have no idea how long I’ve waited to do this,” Erlich hissed in between planting kisses on Bighead’s neck. Erlich’s hot breath on his neck made Bighead feel delirious. Bighead tried to think of a reply, but his senses were overwhelmed. He clasped his hands behind Erlich’s sweaty back like he was holding on for dear life. 

Erlich reached down between them and wrapped his hand around Bighead’s cock, and that was it. He shuddered with the orgasm and spurted all over his stomach and Erlich’s. Erlich felt it, and his fingers dug into Bighead’s hips, pulling him closer and colliding with him a few more times, trying to get himself off quickly. He cried out as he did, and then collapsed on top of him. 

He rolled over to where there was a box of tissues on the nightstand, and wiped Bighead’s cum off their chests. Bighead lay sprawled on the bed. Erlich held him close, with one arm draped over his torso and the other wrapped around his shoulders, his hand stroking Bighead’s hair while he nuzzled against his cheek.

“So. If being business partners means I’ll do that to you again, will you sign the papers?” Erlich whispered into his ear.

“Yeah,” Bighead panted. “As soon as my legs work.”


End file.
